Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Prayers please.

So I have been so overwhelmed lately that I haven't had time to post anything. My grandfather has been diagnosed with brain tumors and only has about another month to live. I went to see him last weekend and couldn't believe what I saw. He has always been a big tough guy, but he looked weaker than I have ever seen him. He was literally skin and bones. The tumor is in a place in his brain that isn't allowing him to talk or swallow. We brought a white board with magnetic letters so he could spell stuff out to us. He is so weak that it is hard for him to point to multiple letters at a time. I know that he is frustrated with his quality of life right now. What is so hard is that he is not ready to die but he has no choice. The doctor said that with some radiation it would prolong his life about a month. Well, he is not taking well to the radiation so they are having to hold off on that until he gets a little stronger. Every time a plan has been made to help him get a little more life it quickly ends up in shambles. I know that he is not ready to go yet and it hurts that there isn't any way for us to give him a Little more time. What is so great about his is that he is so concerned with everyone else while he is going through this. If my grandmother is at the hospital all day, he will tell her to go home so she can rest. He knows that everyone he loves more than anything is about to be in a lot of pain after his passing and it hurts him so much. We know that we cannot save him so I just pray that God will wrap his arms around everyone close to him and comfort them as much as possible. This is going to be a hard next month. I am going to see him one final time in a couple of weeks. I really don't know how to say goodbye to man I love so much. All I can do is tell him how much he means to me and that I will always keep him in my heart. Okay I have to stop typing before I really start crying. All my love!